They are destitute citizens of Empire Bay that can be seen throughout the city, typically in back alleyways and in poorer neighborhoods. They can be seen walking around or sitting down, often drinking from a bottle of Humphrey's Brandy.
- If you stand in front of one for a moment, he may ask you for money and you will be prompted to give him a dollar.
- Standing in front of one may also prompt them to make various statements, one being "Family kidnapped by ninjas, need money for Karate lessons", which is a reference to a once popular internet meme.
- They are the only male characters in Empire Bay who will run away rather than start a fist fight upon shoving them.